Category: action
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Breaking the Bonds 2: Franchise Conclusion
Well, I did it: it took me two and a half months, but I finally watched and wrote a humor recap of every single James Bond movie, including one non-canonical one. And now that I’m done, I have to say: that was a long, long series of films to get through. Over two and a […]
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Spectre
Here we are, at the 24th James Bond film in the franchise, and I am excited. Mostly because after this recap, I am done with my self-imposed exile into James Bond Land and can move onto another project, but also because I am completely Bond-ed out at this point. Look: I love the franchise, I […]
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Skyfall
Second-to-last Bond movie to date and I’m really excited, not only because I’ve heard this is a good one but also because this damn project will soon come to a close. It’s great that there have been 24 movies in this franchise so far, but my God has it been a trek to get through […]
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Quantum of Solace
We open on a sweeping helicopter zipping up to a green mountain and also some cars that are also zipping around this mountain. It’s Bond, and he’s being chased by some dudes that are firing machine guns at him and fucking up stuff in general. A truck is hit and crashes into Bond and […]
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The World Is Not Enough
OK, just two more Brosnan Bonds left but I’ve heard these last two are rough-going so I’ll be sipping on some Sierra Nevada Torpedo during this recap to take the edge off. I also have to say that while I think Brosnan is a pretty solid James Bond, the movies he’s appearing in are […]
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Tomorrow Never Dies
We open on, literally, “A Terrorist Arms Bazaar on the Russian Border,” which must also sell homemade potholders and Christmas ornaments, judging by every other bazaar I’ve been to in my life. A camera robot (?) zooms in and out, R2-D2’ing it all over the place, while some steakhead back at mission control gives […]
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Goldeneye
I bid a fond farewell to Timothy Dalton’s Bond (which was excellent) and welcome Pierce Brosnan as the fifth James Bond in the franchise. I really enjoyed the Goldeneye N64 game in my youth, so I kind of know the broad strokes of this movie. But I’m also leery of it because it involves some […]
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The Living Daylights
Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more! Having recharged from my 15-movie James Bond marathon in November, I’ve rallied to finish the series before New Year’s. This time, I’m filled with holiday cheer (mostly booze), so let’s have a little Bond-ing time. This round, it’s Timothy Dalton’s first outing as Bond in The […]
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Breaking the Bonds 2: Bond Harder
By the end of November 2016, I had watched 15 James Bond movies in 31 days as part of a small project that I started called Breaking the Bonds. Although initially I had set out to watch—and recap as humorously as I could—every single Bond movie within that month, I soon learned that this was […]
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Breaking the Bonds: Conclusion
Before starting this project, in my mind James Bond movies were ones of fun escapism, where we’re whisked away to exotic landscapes and following a protagonist who’s sexy, suave, and smarter than your average bear as he saves the world again and again single-handed. The reality of watching 15 Bond movies within 30 days showed […]
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Never Say Never Again
Like Ouroboros eating its own tail or the infinity sign trapped in a never-ending loop, I’m concluding this session of Breaking the Bonds by starting back with the Bond that began it all: with Sean Connery, in his last appearance–official or otherwise–as James Bond. This movie is a non-canonical (i.e. non-Eon Productions) entry in the […]
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A View to a Kill
We’re already up to 1985 with A View to a Kill, and Roger Moore must be about 60 by now. This is his last Bond film, and with this I say farewell to a pretty good James Bond actor. We open on two Russians flying a helicopter in the Arctic(?) and see James Bond digging […]
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